This was posted by a user named ihadnightmaresofyou on IMDB. If you're a fan of Twin Peaks, you might want to give this a look. He has a great theory on the series, along with the movie. If you have never seen the series, I highly recommend watching it. Also, don't read any further if you haven't. Here is what he wrote:
"I'm surprised I had to come up with this one myself.
It's a long one, but here it goes. IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE SHOW. THIS MIGHT NOT MAKE ANY SENSE.
Many people ask "How is Dale Cooper in the Black Lodge in FWWM, and why doesn't he want Laura to take the ring?"
Well, the ring is from the White Lodge. It makes it so BOB cannot enter them.
Then WHY would Dale Cooper want Laura to be subject to BOB's menacing? Because Dale Cooper IS BOB!!!!
Remember the very last scene in the show? With Dale Cooper looking in the mirror with Bob's reflection? That last scene was not a "cliffhanger" it was a twist.
How's Dale Cooper already in the lodge? Everyone ALWAYS says that the lodge has a strange way with time. Which is quite true. But, how come we don't see LAURA in the lodge? Because she's simply not there, yet. Dale Cooper has always been there.
How? He was stabbed in Pittsburgh and never recovered. Which is why we see him and Windom Earle's wife lying on the floor in the last episode. They're both dead.
Then what have we been watching this whole time?!?!?! Dale Cooper is in the Black Lodge, more of a purgatory, than hell. WHat you are watching. this whole "Laura Palmer investigation" is actually his sins being read to him.
Laura Palmer represents America. Like the country, she is a young, vibrant and beautiful young entity who, at her heart, is good and pure. However, she is seduced by the evils of this world (her drug use and promiscuity) and is ultimately murdered by her father, who is possessed by an evil spirit. This was Lynch's way of symbolizing the tragedy of America, a great country that has been corrupted and raped by greed, hatred and other ills. The character of Leland Palmer, the father, represents the government - generally benevolent and well-meaning in nature, it has been hijacked and controlled by nefarious powers.
But how could Dale Cooper be BOB?!!? That's a difficult question to answer.
What you are watching is very symbolic and isn't what's ACTUALLY happening. Special Agent Dale Cooper is dead. He died from being stabbed in Pittsburgh by Windom Earle because Cooper had an affair with Windom Earle's wife, Catherine. What YOU are watching is: Dale Cooper in purgatory.
His sins are being read to him. But what sins has Dale Cooper done? This is represented by BOB. You are not formally told what kind of person Dale Cooper was before you are actually introduced to him, which is what Bob's for. Dale Cooper, in the show, is the main protaganist, and is a loyal friend to Sherriff Harry Truman. He would NEVER sleep with his girl.
Then WHY would he sleep with his best friend's wife three years ago? Because Dale Cooper is NOT the guy you think he is. Dale Cooper is actually WINDOM EARLE and vice versa.
Sounds crazy, huh? Dale Cooper is actually criminally insane, which is represented by a criminally insane person, Earle, and eventually leads himself to his own downfall, the Black Lodge.
The ONLY evidence I can use to support this is when Windom Earl steals Dale Cooper's girlfriend Annie. It is an exact re-telling of what Dale Cooper has done.
Then what's up with Chet Desmond? Chet Desmond is a plot device to show you that Dale Cooper's life is being investigated. It's just an intro. When he suddenly goes missing by touching the ring, it shows you the first of many scenes involving the Black Lodge.
What was happening in the whole Philip Jeffries scene? Philip Jeffries is an old FBI agent who was previously missing in action for two years. HMM, that's the same amount of time it's been since Dale Cooper was stabbed, coincidence? I think not.
This whole Jeffries scene takes place above the forementioned "convenience store" It's mentioned in the show alot. This scene has commonly been called a "court trial" and I would agree. The scene basically states that BOB is "guilty" of stealing the garmonbozia (pain and suffering). Which basically means BOB has been entering people's bodies and causing trouble. Obviously, this isn't good for anybody. Something has to be done about this. HOW ABOUT THEY MAKE A RING TO STOP ALL OF THIS NONSENSE? And they do. The White Lodge claims all responsibility for it. (Mrs. Chalifont/Tremond and her granson present it to Chet Desmond. Mike (One-Armed Man) gives it to Laura before her death. BOB kills her because he can no longer enter her.)
The most important part of this scene: The Man From Another Place and BOB walk into the Black Lodge. Note: The very next time you see The Black Lodge, they have now produced a ring, but where's BOB? Oh he's right there? As Dale Cooper, and what does he say when they have FINALLY produced a ring, something to stop BOB? "Don't take the ring, Laura."
Who's Judy? NO ONE KNOWS. But many people believe Judy is Josie Packard's sister. This is the reason why she kept going to Seattle. Seattle is where Jeffries has been protecting Judy. Maybe this explains Josie's mysterious death. BOB kills her and asks "Coop, what happened to Josie? What happened to Josie?" Similar to "How's Annie?" Judy is basically another way to show Josie's lodge connection.
What could have happened that made Jeffries go to the lodge? Could it be that Jeffries's case was the exact same thing as Cooper's? Yet another retelling.
Then why would he visit Dale Cooper in his dream? Because Jeffries is trying to convince Cooper this isn't a normal dream. This is THE dream, this is his final dream. His end is about to come.
The rest is all of the things Dale Cooper has done as BOB. BOB, simply is Pandora's Box, all that's evil in the world."
Sunday, August 31, 2008
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Meet The Robinsons (3.30.07)
A orphan who is a kid genius, Lewis, invents a machine that will bring back old memories that are stored in a person's brain that they could relive if they would like. He never met his mother and so he would like to use this machine to see who she was and what she was like. But when he tries to put it in the science fair for his school, a villian by the name of Bowler Hat Guy comes and fiddles with it without Lewis knowing and that causes the machine to not work which then causes Lewis to consider himself a failure. The Bowler Hat Guy then steals it to use for his own good when the science fair goes haywire and the gym is evacuated because of all the other stuff going on like a volcano exploding and sprinklers in the gym go off.
He meets Wilbur Robinson, a kid from the future. Wilbur takes Lewis to the future to meet the rest of the Robinson family, and also to stop the Bowler Hat Guy and his evil doings. Oh and there is a twist that is totally obvious.
Is it just me or has Disney lost their mind? First they lay off a bunch of people and decide not to release as many films as they usually do and possibly get rid of all their other branched studios like Touchstone because they make so much money from films like Pirates and whatever Pixar has to offer. Here's the story: http://www.rottentomatoes.com/news/comments/?entryid=343283
Yet at the same time, their films have not been that great. This is one example. This movie is so awful that I was screaming at the screen wanting the movie to end. Seriously I was. I mean I was the only person watching the movie because I had to check it for scratches and stuff at 1:30am. Yet it just kept on going.
There is nothing original in this film. None of the characters are interesting and there was not one single time where I laughed. And I can usually laugh at a good Disney film if they team up with Pixar. I loved Finding Nemo, Cars and The Incredibles. I seriously think Disney should not do anymore of their own CGI films because the animation looks awful and their ideas just aren't original. I think the only thing that I liked about this one was the cartoon before the movie called "Boat Builders". It was a cartoon from the early days of Disney with Donald, Mickey and Goofy. That was cool.
But all together, this movie was boring, stupid, and cliched.
Rating: 1.5 (Out of 4)
He meets Wilbur Robinson, a kid from the future. Wilbur takes Lewis to the future to meet the rest of the Robinson family, and also to stop the Bowler Hat Guy and his evil doings. Oh and there is a twist that is totally obvious.
Is it just me or has Disney lost their mind? First they lay off a bunch of people and decide not to release as many films as they usually do and possibly get rid of all their other branched studios like Touchstone because they make so much money from films like Pirates and whatever Pixar has to offer. Here's the story: http://www.rottentomatoes.com/news/comments/?entryid=343283
Yet at the same time, their films have not been that great. This is one example. This movie is so awful that I was screaming at the screen wanting the movie to end. Seriously I was. I mean I was the only person watching the movie because I had to check it for scratches and stuff at 1:30am. Yet it just kept on going.
There is nothing original in this film. None of the characters are interesting and there was not one single time where I laughed. And I can usually laugh at a good Disney film if they team up with Pixar. I loved Finding Nemo, Cars and The Incredibles. I seriously think Disney should not do anymore of their own CGI films because the animation looks awful and their ideas just aren't original. I think the only thing that I liked about this one was the cartoon before the movie called "Boat Builders". It was a cartoon from the early days of Disney with Donald, Mickey and Goofy. That was cool.
But all together, this movie was boring, stupid, and cliched.
Rating: 1.5 (Out of 4)
The Invisible (4.27.07)
David S. Goyer cannot direct. This is his third film that he's directed. The other two were Blade Trinity and a film called ZigZag. I saw Blade Trinity and that was a really great way to let fans of the franchise down. It really sucked. Now he directs this movie, which is a remake of a Swedish film and was also a novel.
Nick Powell (Justin Chatwin, the kid that played Robbie in War of the Worlds) is a smart kid that everyone likes. They all look to him for help when it comes to French papers and other school assignments. I missed a bit of the beginning but I know that Nick's dad is dead and there was a party going on for Nick's graduation or something.
Annie Newton (Margarita Levieva, who?) is a rebellious teen. She robs and steals and does all sorts of stupid things. She hates pretty much everyone except for her boyfriend, Marcus, who is on parole. Her father lost his job as a police officer and now he's a security guard and her mom is dead and her stepmom is a lazy bitch that she hates. Annie and Marcus are out and about and they steal a BMW. Before they leave in the stolen car, Annie decides to run up and break into a jewelery shop and steal some necklaces and stuff. She is dumb enough to leave the stuff in her locker at school. Marcus didn't want her to steal the jewelry; he just wanted the car. So he rats her out to the authorities and she gets in trouble. She calls Marcus from the police department and tells him that somebody told. She is lead to believe that Nick did it. So she and her posse go find Nick and drag him out to the woods. They beat him up and then he pisses Annie off so much that before they leave, Annie kicks him right in the face. She kicks him so hard that it breaks Nick's neck. They suspect he's dead and so they hide the body. Nick wakes up not knowing he's dead. He goes to class and starts to talk to his girlfriend but she does not acknowledge him. The class then talks about one of Nick's poems that he wrote and make fun of it. He thinks everyone is ignoring him and so he takes a fat text book and throws it against the wall. It breaks some shelves, but then (GASP!) the shelves are back in place. Everything that he does, such as slap somebody, run into somebody, etc., happens but he is the only one that sees the reaction. It's all in his head. For some reason he can't figure it out. Hell I figured that out after the second or third thing he did. He then realizes that he is still alive actually after he is chilling at his house and sees his tweetie bird run into the window and sit there and suffer. The bird appears on his shoulder and he plays with it for a while and then it vanishes. He looks outside and sees his bird is dead. So even though no one can see or hear him, he knows he's still alive. Now he has to talk some sense into Annie through his creepy ghost limbo way and tell her to find his body so he can regain consciousness and get back on with his life.
This movie is so unrealistic it's not even funny. When Nick gets kicked in the face, you actually hear his neck break. Now from what I know, after someone's neck snaps after a kick or a huge twist, they're dead. So I don't see how he could possibly still be alive after that. I will say this; this story has been done before. Anyone remember the movie Ghost? Except this movie is a thriller but then it turns into a love story; it's not a love story the entire time. Towards the end, it becomes a complete Ghost rip-off and it is so cliched and stupid and obvious. There is no surprise or touching moment in this film. I was telling myself while watching this that now would be a good time to revise Mystery Science Theater 3000 and they can make fun of this movie along with the other crap that came out this weekend.
Seriously, stay as far away from this movie as possible. Go watch Hot Fuzz. That is more entertaining and it is intentionally funny to where this is unintentionally. David Goyer can write some okay scripts (he wrote Batman Begins and is also doing The Dark Knight). But please someone tell him stop directing.
Rating: 0 (out of 4)
Nick Powell (Justin Chatwin, the kid that played Robbie in War of the Worlds) is a smart kid that everyone likes. They all look to him for help when it comes to French papers and other school assignments. I missed a bit of the beginning but I know that Nick's dad is dead and there was a party going on for Nick's graduation or something.
Annie Newton (Margarita Levieva, who?) is a rebellious teen. She robs and steals and does all sorts of stupid things. She hates pretty much everyone except for her boyfriend, Marcus, who is on parole. Her father lost his job as a police officer and now he's a security guard and her mom is dead and her stepmom is a lazy bitch that she hates. Annie and Marcus are out and about and they steal a BMW. Before they leave in the stolen car, Annie decides to run up and break into a jewelery shop and steal some necklaces and stuff. She is dumb enough to leave the stuff in her locker at school. Marcus didn't want her to steal the jewelry; he just wanted the car. So he rats her out to the authorities and she gets in trouble. She calls Marcus from the police department and tells him that somebody told. She is lead to believe that Nick did it. So she and her posse go find Nick and drag him out to the woods. They beat him up and then he pisses Annie off so much that before they leave, Annie kicks him right in the face. She kicks him so hard that it breaks Nick's neck. They suspect he's dead and so they hide the body. Nick wakes up not knowing he's dead. He goes to class and starts to talk to his girlfriend but she does not acknowledge him. The class then talks about one of Nick's poems that he wrote and make fun of it. He thinks everyone is ignoring him and so he takes a fat text book and throws it against the wall. It breaks some shelves, but then (GASP!) the shelves are back in place. Everything that he does, such as slap somebody, run into somebody, etc., happens but he is the only one that sees the reaction. It's all in his head. For some reason he can't figure it out. Hell I figured that out after the second or third thing he did. He then realizes that he is still alive actually after he is chilling at his house and sees his tweetie bird run into the window and sit there and suffer. The bird appears on his shoulder and he plays with it for a while and then it vanishes. He looks outside and sees his bird is dead. So even though no one can see or hear him, he knows he's still alive. Now he has to talk some sense into Annie through his creepy ghost limbo way and tell her to find his body so he can regain consciousness and get back on with his life.
This movie is so unrealistic it's not even funny. When Nick gets kicked in the face, you actually hear his neck break. Now from what I know, after someone's neck snaps after a kick or a huge twist, they're dead. So I don't see how he could possibly still be alive after that. I will say this; this story has been done before. Anyone remember the movie Ghost? Except this movie is a thriller but then it turns into a love story; it's not a love story the entire time. Towards the end, it becomes a complete Ghost rip-off and it is so cliched and stupid and obvious. There is no surprise or touching moment in this film. I was telling myself while watching this that now would be a good time to revise Mystery Science Theater 3000 and they can make fun of this movie along with the other crap that came out this weekend.
Seriously, stay as far away from this movie as possible. Go watch Hot Fuzz. That is more entertaining and it is intentionally funny to where this is unintentionally. David Goyer can write some okay scripts (he wrote Batman Begins and is also doing The Dark Knight). But please someone tell him stop directing.
Rating: 0 (out of 4)
Lucky You (5.4.07)
It wasn't really the smartest idea to release this movie against Spider-Man 3. It's pretty much career suicide if you ask me. Well in more ways than one, this movie is career suicide for a few of the actors and the director himself.
It's usually not a bad thing to see a director or an actor try something different for a change. Adam Sandler just did Reign Over Me and was incredible in that movie. Ridley Scott (Gladiator, Black Hawk Down) has stepped aside from directing bloddy, gritty films a couple times (Matchstick Men, A Good Year) and Matchstick Men was really good but I didn't really hear anything positive on A Good Year so I never saw it. Well anyways, director Curits Hanson's (8 Mile, LA Confidential) film before this was a "chick flick" (In Her Shoes) and I never saw it but I heard it wasn't a bad movie. And I don't really mind watching "chick flicks". I liked The Notebook and Love Actually and a few others. I usually like it when good directors do something different, but this is not a good example.
Eric Bana (Munich, Black Hawk Down) plays Huck Cheever, a professional poker player trying to qualify for the World Series of Poker for a chance to win 2.5 million so he can get out of debt. He meets Bille, played by Drew Barrymore, and they both fall in love but he can't figure out how to balance his poker life with his love life. He also has to put up with the dysfunctional relationship he has with his dad LC (Robert Duvall), who is a legend in the poker business.
The characters in this movie are all one dimensional. The chemistry between Huck and Billie is very dull. They talk and talk and talk but nothing really funny or interesting comes out of their mouths. It's usually a bad poker reference that is somehow tying into the love relationship or the line is just cheesy and it was pulled out of the book of overused cheesy lines that worked the first time they were used in a love story but by now don't work at all. The relationship between Huck and LC is underdeveloped and it tries to make us cry or make us feel emotional but neither of the characters have chemistry between them. Some of the humor is so awkward and lame. I don't see how anyone could really find some of the jokes in this movie funny. Or any of the jokes for that matter.
It's kind of sad to see two great acotrs like Eric Bana and Robert Duvall in some hokey love story like this. What's also weird is that Horatio Sanz (is he still on Saturday Night Live?) is in this move and I was hoping he would have a few funny parts but nope, he didn't.
Like I said before, this is career suicide for the actors and director. Eric Bana is a really good actor but it shows that he can't do well with love stories. Robert Duvall is a legend and he can play in any movie he wants to but at the same time, he needs to be careful in the roles he picks because this was not a good role for him. I've never really liked Drew Barrymore so I can't say much about her. Curtis Hanson, I think, is a great director and LA Confidential is one of the best movies I have ever seen. 8 Mile was good and to me, it showed that Eminem can go from being a horrible rapper to a decent actor. This film just doesn't really work though. It's not romantic nor is it funny. It tries to be a film about poker and a film about love but neither the poker part of the film nor the love part of the film has a pulse. The movie just goes and goes and goes and nothing really happens and it's so predictable how it will turn out.
Rating: 1 star (out of 4)
It's usually not a bad thing to see a director or an actor try something different for a change. Adam Sandler just did Reign Over Me and was incredible in that movie. Ridley Scott (Gladiator, Black Hawk Down) has stepped aside from directing bloddy, gritty films a couple times (Matchstick Men, A Good Year) and Matchstick Men was really good but I didn't really hear anything positive on A Good Year so I never saw it. Well anyways, director Curits Hanson's (8 Mile, LA Confidential) film before this was a "chick flick" (In Her Shoes) and I never saw it but I heard it wasn't a bad movie. And I don't really mind watching "chick flicks". I liked The Notebook and Love Actually and a few others. I usually like it when good directors do something different, but this is not a good example.
Eric Bana (Munich, Black Hawk Down) plays Huck Cheever, a professional poker player trying to qualify for the World Series of Poker for a chance to win 2.5 million so he can get out of debt. He meets Bille, played by Drew Barrymore, and they both fall in love but he can't figure out how to balance his poker life with his love life. He also has to put up with the dysfunctional relationship he has with his dad LC (Robert Duvall), who is a legend in the poker business.
The characters in this movie are all one dimensional. The chemistry between Huck and Billie is very dull. They talk and talk and talk but nothing really funny or interesting comes out of their mouths. It's usually a bad poker reference that is somehow tying into the love relationship or the line is just cheesy and it was pulled out of the book of overused cheesy lines that worked the first time they were used in a love story but by now don't work at all. The relationship between Huck and LC is underdeveloped and it tries to make us cry or make us feel emotional but neither of the characters have chemistry between them. Some of the humor is so awkward and lame. I don't see how anyone could really find some of the jokes in this movie funny. Or any of the jokes for that matter.
It's kind of sad to see two great acotrs like Eric Bana and Robert Duvall in some hokey love story like this. What's also weird is that Horatio Sanz (is he still on Saturday Night Live?) is in this move and I was hoping he would have a few funny parts but nope, he didn't.
Like I said before, this is career suicide for the actors and director. Eric Bana is a really good actor but it shows that he can't do well with love stories. Robert Duvall is a legend and he can play in any movie he wants to but at the same time, he needs to be careful in the roles he picks because this was not a good role for him. I've never really liked Drew Barrymore so I can't say much about her. Curtis Hanson, I think, is a great director and LA Confidential is one of the best movies I have ever seen. 8 Mile was good and to me, it showed that Eminem can go from being a horrible rapper to a decent actor. This film just doesn't really work though. It's not romantic nor is it funny. It tries to be a film about poker and a film about love but neither the poker part of the film nor the love part of the film has a pulse. The movie just goes and goes and goes and nothing really happens and it's so predictable how it will turn out.
Rating: 1 star (out of 4)
Dragon Wars (9.13.07)
Usually I would go in depth with my film reviews. But this one, I won't even bother. I will just say it.
DO NOT SEE THIS MOVIE!!!!!
It is so terrible. The special effects look like something straight from a Sci-Fi Channel original movie. Yes they are that bad. The story is just wretched and so unbelievable.
It is based off a Korean legend about dragons who will one day crash into Earth and try to destroy it. There's more to it but there is really no point in going in depth. I watched this movie for free and got paid to watch it and still it was the most painful 90 minutes ever. The dragons look like king cobras, not dragons. They don't even breathe fire. But there are some that shoot out explosive fireballs. And those look like a bad rip off of a Jurassic Park dinosaur strapped with wings from a bat. And then there are some creatures that I have no idea what the hell they were called because the film didn't mention the names. They were fat, waddling creatures with cannons on their back.
All right I think that's enough. The film makes little to no sense, the scenes that are supposed to be funny aren't and the movie just flat out sucks. This is the worst movie I have seen. Well I think Sound of Thunder is worse but not by much. Oh and if you have never heard of this movie, here's a preview:
Rating: -1 (out of 4) (Yes I can rate a movie at minus one. I make the ratings, I set my own rules on how high or low I can grade them)
DO NOT SEE THIS MOVIE!!!!!
It is so terrible. The special effects look like something straight from a Sci-Fi Channel original movie. Yes they are that bad. The story is just wretched and so unbelievable.
It is based off a Korean legend about dragons who will one day crash into Earth and try to destroy it. There's more to it but there is really no point in going in depth. I watched this movie for free and got paid to watch it and still it was the most painful 90 minutes ever. The dragons look like king cobras, not dragons. They don't even breathe fire. But there are some that shoot out explosive fireballs. And those look like a bad rip off of a Jurassic Park dinosaur strapped with wings from a bat. And then there are some creatures that I have no idea what the hell they were called because the film didn't mention the names. They were fat, waddling creatures with cannons on their back.
All right I think that's enough. The film makes little to no sense, the scenes that are supposed to be funny aren't and the movie just flat out sucks. This is the worst movie I have seen. Well I think Sound of Thunder is worse but not by much. Oh and if you have never heard of this movie, here's a preview:
Rating: -1 (out of 4) (Yes I can rate a movie at minus one. I make the ratings, I set my own rules on how high or low I can grade them)
In The Valley of Elah
This is the second directorial effort from Paul Haggis (director of Crash, writer for Million Dollar Baby). This is also the first film I've been paid to watch on a late Thursday night that I actually liked.
Based on a true story, Tommy Lee Jones plays career officer Hank Deerfield. His son, Mike, is supposed to be home from the war in Iraq but ends up going AWOL and nobody in the military knows where he went. Hank then sets out on an investigation with his wife (Susan Sarandon) and a police detective (Charlize Theron) to find out what happened to Mike.
For those that don't know, the title of the film comes from the biblical story of David and Goliath. The reason why they gave it that title doesn't quite come full force until the end.
After watching such garbage like Dragon Wars, Daddy Day Camp and Lucky You, it felt good to finally get paid to watch a good movie. Tommy Lee Jones is just incredible in this film and all the other actors do a great job as well. I don't expect it to draw a big crowd of people because it's an indie film and some people just might look at this as another anti-war film. While it is kind of an anti-war film, it is still a good film. I didn't like it as much as I did Crash or Million Dollar Baby but still, I'll recommend it.
Rating: 3 stars (Out of 4)
Based on a true story, Tommy Lee Jones plays career officer Hank Deerfield. His son, Mike, is supposed to be home from the war in Iraq but ends up going AWOL and nobody in the military knows where he went. Hank then sets out on an investigation with his wife (Susan Sarandon) and a police detective (Charlize Theron) to find out what happened to Mike.
For those that don't know, the title of the film comes from the biblical story of David and Goliath. The reason why they gave it that title doesn't quite come full force until the end.
After watching such garbage like Dragon Wars, Daddy Day Camp and Lucky You, it felt good to finally get paid to watch a good movie. Tommy Lee Jones is just incredible in this film and all the other actors do a great job as well. I don't expect it to draw a big crowd of people because it's an indie film and some people just might look at this as another anti-war film. While it is kind of an anti-war film, it is still a good film. I didn't like it as much as I did Crash or Million Dollar Baby but still, I'll recommend it.
Rating: 3 stars (Out of 4)
The Comebacks (10.19.07)
Here we go with yet another review of another crappy movie. This time, it's The Comebacks.
This is a spoof of all the inspirational sports films. Some of them include Rocky, Invincible, Radio, Dodgeball (that's inspirational?), and Field of Dreams. There are a bunch of others but I don't feel like naming them off. None of it is funny though unless you like really juvenile humor.
The film follows a loser coach by the name of Lambeau Fields (David Koechner, aka Champ from Anchorman) who decides to take a bunch of loser college kids and put together a football team. The coach is quite possibly the worst coach ever and hopefully, he can get this team in shape and prove to be a great one.
From the producers of Wedding Crashers comes one of the dumbest comedies ever made. I don't see how people can continue to make dumbass spoof films. The Scary Movie series sucks. And then came all those other ones such as Date Movie, Not Another Teen Movie, Epic Movie, and sometime next year comes a film that spoofs 300 called Meet The Spartans (trailer for it right before this movie). Why can't someone just go down to Hollywood and tell them personally that we don't need more of this bullshit? I think the last good spoof film was Hot Shots: Part Deux. And then after that, the genre pretty much died. Mainly because directors nowadays seem to rely on nothing but potty humor and stuff that will only make kids between the ages of 7 and 16 laugh.
To tell you the truth, I was glad I got to watch this one and not the remake of The Ten Commandments. Honestly, if you only had two films to choose from, would you rather sit through this movie or an 90 minute animated musical remake of a classic film? Yeah I thought so.
Rating: 0 stars (out of 4) (I can't believe we got this piece of crap and The Ten Commandments and not The Assassination of Jesse James (I'll probably go watch that in Paradise) or Things We Lost in the Fire. Hopefully next week.
PS. I hate Fox now more than ever. Ever since they made the dumb decision to cancel Arrested Development, Will Arnett has been in nothing but crappy films such as this one, Let's Go To Prison and The Brothers Solomon. And I also hate whoever said it was okay to use Journey's "Don't Stop Believin'" for a montage sequence in this film.
P.S.S When the end credits started, the first one said Directed by Tom Brady. I was laughing so hard when that came up. And then I found out it's not the Patriots QB Tom Brady. Instead it's some dumbass who felt he could be cool and have the same name as a famous football player.
This is a spoof of all the inspirational sports films. Some of them include Rocky, Invincible, Radio, Dodgeball (that's inspirational?), and Field of Dreams. There are a bunch of others but I don't feel like naming them off. None of it is funny though unless you like really juvenile humor.
The film follows a loser coach by the name of Lambeau Fields (David Koechner, aka Champ from Anchorman) who decides to take a bunch of loser college kids and put together a football team. The coach is quite possibly the worst coach ever and hopefully, he can get this team in shape and prove to be a great one.
From the producers of Wedding Crashers comes one of the dumbest comedies ever made. I don't see how people can continue to make dumbass spoof films. The Scary Movie series sucks. And then came all those other ones such as Date Movie, Not Another Teen Movie, Epic Movie, and sometime next year comes a film that spoofs 300 called Meet The Spartans (trailer for it right before this movie). Why can't someone just go down to Hollywood and tell them personally that we don't need more of this bullshit? I think the last good spoof film was Hot Shots: Part Deux. And then after that, the genre pretty much died. Mainly because directors nowadays seem to rely on nothing but potty humor and stuff that will only make kids between the ages of 7 and 16 laugh.
To tell you the truth, I was glad I got to watch this one and not the remake of The Ten Commandments. Honestly, if you only had two films to choose from, would you rather sit through this movie or an 90 minute animated musical remake of a classic film? Yeah I thought so.
Rating: 0 stars (out of 4) (I can't believe we got this piece of crap and The Ten Commandments and not The Assassination of Jesse James (I'll probably go watch that in Paradise) or Things We Lost in the Fire. Hopefully next week.
PS. I hate Fox now more than ever. Ever since they made the dumb decision to cancel Arrested Development, Will Arnett has been in nothing but crappy films such as this one, Let's Go To Prison and The Brothers Solomon. And I also hate whoever said it was okay to use Journey's "Don't Stop Believin'" for a montage sequence in this film.
P.S.S When the end credits started, the first one said Directed by Tom Brady. I was laughing so hard when that came up. And then I found out it's not the Patriots QB Tom Brady. Instead it's some dumbass who felt he could be cool and have the same name as a famous football player.
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